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Teach phenomenon of a failure
From;    Author:Stand originally
Some school was in Shanghai a few days ago the discovery when a domestic education tax has a test: The parent can say on ten generally to the defect of own child at a heat, can mention an advantage to fumble however, speak 9 only mostly. Expert proposal, the parent does not answer to child expectation value highbrow, lest give the child to create tremendous drive pressure, and even the mental health that affects the child.

Education of family of courtyard of city teaching division coachs central expert Le Shanyao says, nearly 100 parents attend class at that time. Should ask about " who can speak the child 10 defect " when, raise one's hand of many 20 parent makes a speech, some returns truly to ponder adduce ten; But ask about the child when 10 advantages, beat almost full-court. 34 parents reluctance answers give 9, the cudgel one's brains of the others, one does not answer to go out. The expert points out, the test is not individual phenomenon as a result, the 67 parents that become a high school student are malcontent to the child, satisfactory least of all is study result.

The parent of a 6 grade student says, his daughter is taken an examination of into the class inside before 10, elated ground hum song, but he reminds the child not to want be pleased with oneself. Reason is a class inside before 10 go to nearly 100 with respect to the platoon in grade, how can be this achievement taken an examination of into good high school? After the child listens, feel very grievance. The expert points out, many parents see the progress that is less than the child, and a certain respect that always likes to take him child and more outstanding child are compared, the result compares more dissatisfactory more, make the child's pressure grows day and day.

Dissatisfactory germ, it is the parent's exorbitant expectation value. The mother of classmate of small king of second year in high school of some middle school tells the author, she is all energy is beautiful go up in son body, the son has progress, she had a result with respect to the painstaking effort that considers as her. But she always feels the son tries hard not quite again, did not achieve her requirement. Now, originally obedient son psychology is gone against instead, mother child cannot communicate basically.

Le Shanyao points out, parents is dissatisfactory to the child, the likelihood causes psychological problem of the child. Many children are used go against come instead " fight pressure " , but bear ability is limited after all, pressure looks for less than releasing again greatly too channel, give an issue easily. If the parent evaluates the child only with study result stand or fall, make achievement is become " what cannot bear is heavy " , other ability even if also cannot get affirmation again by force, make the child easily inactive and disappointed, individual middle and primary school is born to use the extreme means such as the suicide likely even.
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